Whatever happened twenty years ago is over

Genesis 33 is the story Jacob reuniting with his brother Esau.  In his  last encounter with his brother, Jacob had cheated Esau and ran away in fear.  So, he could understandably be facing some trepidation about the reunion.  Especially when his brother has an army of 400 men with him;  similar to the amount that Abraham had when he saved Lot from foreign kings.

Jacob goes to some extremes in preparing for his reunion with his brother.  And these extremes reveal much of Jacob’s selfishness.  First he sends everyone else over the night before and remains by himself on the safe side of the river.  (God kicking his butt and making him limp might have been a good clue at that point.)  Next, he lines up his children to meet their uncle in what could be charitably suggested as oldest to youngest, but more likely is least favored to most favored.  Finally, he is very apologetic as he approaches his brother.  Obsequious.  Sincere but smarmy.

For his twin brother, though it has been twenty years since he saw his brother.  Esau hugs him and accepts the gift as a sign of repentance and forgiveness.  It’s over; Jacob can come home.

Instead, Jacob goes somewhere else.  Sure, there wasn’t room for him and Esau together on the same land.  He could still have gone over for dinner.  Maybe see his dad.  On the other hand, where he goes is not that far away either.  (Jeru)Salem is pretty close to Bethel and all are in the Hebron valley.

It is easy to read of Jacob from afar though and wonder how he could be so close to reconciliation and not reach out and have it.  It’s like watching a movie and the entire audience knows from the beginning which characters will end up together if only they could work it out.  And then they do, yay!  But like in the movies, as the characters deny their relationships, there is something very true about Jacob not being willing to trust his brother further.  We believe our own talk and self-deception, especially when we are practiced like Jacob at deceiving others.

Our sin nature doesn’t have a mechanism for extending trust.  Even with the imago dei of our creation, we still need the model of a savior.  I recently commented on a friend’s posting about game theory teaching us tit-for-tat and that being a trap of rationalism that never produces forgiveness.  We become trapped in perpetual mistrust.

Jacob is so close.  He even builds an altar to worship God at his new home.  With only a bit more trust in God and his brother he could have been truly part of life abundant.  But he doesn’t.  He comes home and then stays away and lives on his own and buys a new family from Shechem instead of living with his brother in harmony.

Pray that we can do better.  We can offer trust more.  Perhaps then we might encounter the abundant life that is part of the reign of God.

A worker deserves his wages

Gen 31:14 – Gen 32:3

There are two main points in this story.

1. A worker deserves his wages.
2. A family should not stay too long in the grandparent’s home.

One of my favorite shows of all time is Joss Whedon’s Firefly.  Towards the end of the pilot Serenity, Captain Malcolm Reynolds is very succint on this first matter.

Mal stalks forward, shoves his gun right up in Patience’s face.

MAL Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job.

He takes the money back.

MAL (cont’d) And then I get paid.

He moves his gun from her face.

MAL (cont’d) Go run your little world.

This is essentially the agreement that Jacob and Laban reach.  Jacob leaves, Laban chases him down.  They have a heated exchange and they go their own way.

This point is commonly made in the Hebrew Scriptures and then referenced in the Epistles to specifically refer to paying ministers of the Gospel.  Pay people for thier efforts.  Don’t hold back or cheat them.

One of the smartest managers that I have ever worked for reccomends actually paying people slightly more than they think that they are worth for the maximum loyalty and productivity.

(There is also a bit about Rachael stealing Laban’s household idols and using her feminine condition to get away with it. This serves as good foil to exhaust Laban’s anger compared to the other claims. Ironically, although it is never proven, it is the one thing legitimately being stolen.)

For the second point, I am cautious of this since right now at least two of my friends with children are currently living in thier parent’s home.  The situations are temporary and there are extenuating circumstances.  I moved back in with my parent’s for two months during my first time of unemployment after college, moving from LA back to Seattle.  None of these situations are ideal.   In Jacob’s case, however, he lived in Laban’s house for twenty years and most of the time it was problematic.  If we want to learn from this biblical example we would probably avoid this situation especially when, as is common amongst flawed humanity,  e.g. both Jacob and Laban, either the parents or the grandparents are using the other.